Saturday, April 23, 2011

let them flow

The wine bottle was popped open and crysal glasses were filled. Had a good company of friends and the words started flowing. Books were dissected, writers examined, philosophies and world history cross checked. We conversed about kings and queens, Jesus meeting Buddha somewhere in the northern part of Indian subcontinent, matters of hearts and life, Def Leppards and personal philosophies, beliefs. The music flowed with conversations, we shared food for body as well as mind. Oh! It made me realise how much I had missed such intellectual stimulating conversations!

Someone come and talk to me about poems and poets, about art and artists, philosophers and their philosophies, universe out there and universe inside.. here... I know you are out there, I know there are more people, weird, defiant, daydreamers, nerdy souls, word lovers.. Come and talk to me, even if a while and even if in lengths of time.. I am hungry for knowledge, I am thirsty for answers and may be together we can cross the realm of what is and what is not and perhaps someday find a place where everything 'be'...

I admit I have to learn a lot, and I might be able to contribute little on the talking part, but I can listen. I am a good listener, I can open up my heart and let you pour your thoughts into it. I thirst for such companions, my strange and weird friends who have all now grown up and become 'levelheaded and matured' I miss your crappy talks where we tried to make heads and tails of this world and ourselves. Then there were no walls between people, then we had this naivety which made us have faith even on a new found friend, we never questioned each others profession, age and motives. Then, when we could look into the eyes of each other and pass on a little bit of our souls, like breads around a dining table. We could feast on the pile of our souls, without having to fear that it might not be enough, that we would not have our fill..


Out here, it gets pretty darn tough to meet people without any walls. Everyone has a wall built around them, even I do, I learnt it with time. A lot of mistrust, judgemental thinking and generalisation runs here.  I think human souls need osmosis in regular basis to survive.. exchange of stories, feelings, thoughts.. learning from each other... But with these walls around, nothing gets exchanged. And soon you become a soul zombie, your view of the world gets narrower, you start to put people under catagories, friends become mere networking equipments... and I might go crazy.

I was talking to someone this last week and he admited that he felt the same when I said that people have glass walls around them here.. you see each other but the walls seal out any real form of communication. There are so many isolated single stories here. I have had my single stories about people as well, but I have learnt to shed them gracefully. He was one of them too. I had a thought that people from the other spectrum of living were different than us who lived under the shadows. But talking to him made me realise again what is a simple truth that we keep forgetting, no matter where we live, we share the same sky! We have our differences but we share similarities too. We love, we have our fears, we have our insecurities, we have our hopes... Among so many stereotyping about who is who, questions about morality of certain group of people, questions about their lifestyle.. I have learnt that it is essential to keep open mind when it comes to people, in order to avoid  the danger of falling into the traps of a narrow mind.

Here I remember Chimamanda Adiche, an African writer-ess, and her talk about how we form single stories about people and community. I can relate so much to what she says here. I have been having the mental shift she talks about as well.


These days have been strange, I watched an animaed movie Rango and what a feast it was to my senses. The weird imagery, walking cactus plants under the amorphous moonlight stirred something inside me. I know how they feel, forever walking towards water but finding none. But there was something else that stuck up a chord.

"A man can never escape his own story." says the imaginary friend the green lizard has. I have been feeling it too. " You are like a gypsy witch soul trapped inside those expensive business suits, you should shed some of those walls and open up to the universe in order to be more receptive of your true self." A friend had said. I have always known that, though it was temporarily forgotten. The seeds were always there, just that a thick layer of hot tar had been laid and the road was just a lifeless, cold, coarse asphalt, slithering like a black snake. Time has worked it's magic though. The seeds, the minutest form of life have decided to fight back and broken through the lifeless layer of black. It has cracked and new leaves have sprouted. Soon the whole path will be covered with green leaves and flowers of every hue and design that you can possibly imagine.


Now a days, I feel that I can expand and cover the universe in blink of an eye at times. I feel strong force pulling and pushing me towards a new direction. I find myself getting attracted to new things, experiences, I find it easier to embrace changes and accept what I have no power to change. It is like series of awakenings are happening every moment. I am getting in tune with the forces of life and nature. The way is a bit hazy but I have found that with faith even the unknown seems to shower you back with what your hearts truest desires are. Every day, I realise some part of me that was laying redundant like a forgotten memory. Things are stirring up slowly inside me, like a witch's broth.

 

I know, these business suits will have to go someday. This gypsy witch will pick up her broom, beat the dust off and fly across the purple sky.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

point B - Sarah Kay


Someday, I am going to read this to my daughter too.. hopefully. Happy reading my Phantom Readers..

Point B- Sarah Kay

Instead of mom she’s gonna call me point B
Because that way she knows that no matter what happens,
at least she can always find her way to me.
And I’m gonna paint the solar system on the back of her hand
so that she has to know the entire universe before she can say
oh, I know that like the back of my hand.
She’s gonna learn that this life will hit you
Hard.
In the face.
Wait for you to get back up so it can kick you in the stomach.
But the wind knocked out of you is the only way
to remind your lungs how much they like the taste of air.
There is hurt here that cannot be fixed by bandaids or poetry
So the first time she realizes that wonderwoman isn’t coming,
I’ll make sure she doesn’t have to wear the cape all by herself
Cause no matter how wide you stretch your fingers,
your hands will always be too small to catch all the pain you want to heal.
Believe me , I’ve tried.
And baby, I’ll tell her.
Don’t keep your nose up in the air like that. I know that trick.
You’re just smelling for smoke,
so you can follow that trail back to a burning house,
so you can find the boy who lost everything in the fire
to see if you can save him
Or else find the boy who lit the fire in the first place
to see if you can change him
But I know that she will anyways so instead
I’ll always keep an extra supply of chocolate and rainboots nearby
because there’s no heartbreak chocolate can’t fix.
Okay there’s a few heartbreaks chocolate can’t fix.
But that’s what the rainboots are for,
because rain will wash away everything if you let it. ‘
I want her to see the world through the underside of a glass bottomed boat.
To look through a magnifying glass at the galaxies that exist
on the pinpoint of a human mind because that’s the way my mom taught me,
that there’ll be days like this
there’ll be days like this my momma said
When you open your hands to catch
and only wind up with blisters and bruises.
When you step out of the phonebooth and try to fly
and the very people you want to save are the ones standing on your cape.
When your boots will fill with rain
and you’ll be up to your knees in disappointment 
and those are the very days you have all the more reason to say thank you.
Cause there’s nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to
stop kissing the shoreline no matter how many times it’s sent away.
You will put the wind in win some lose some
you will put the star in starting over and over
 no matter how many land mines erupt in a minute
be sure your mind lands on the beauty of this funny place called life.
And yes, on a scale of one to trusting I am pretty f****ing nave.
 But I want her to know that this world is made out of sugar.
And sure, it can crumble so easily but don’t be afraid to
stick your tongue out and taste it.
And baby, I’ll tell her.
 Remember your mama is a worrier,
but your papa is a warrior and
 you are the girl with small hands and big eyes who never stops asking for more.
Remember that good things come in threes,
and so do bad things,
 and always apologize when you’ve done something wrong,
 but don’t ever apologize for the way your eyes refuse to stop shining
and your voice is small,
but don’t ever stop singing,
and when they finally hand you heartbreak,
 slip hatred and war under your doorstep
and hand you hand outs on streetcorners of cynicism and defeat
you tell them they really ought to meet your mother.

Much Love/
- The Warrior Poetess
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